Johnny A'Thing
Depairtment stores are awfu' neat,
an' yon emporiums look rare,
but “Johnny A'Thing” doon the street
is shop that's welcome onywhere.
It's aye sae handy: fu' o' stuff,
wi' bits o' things ye're shair tae need.
Like faggots, custard, fags, an' snuff,
new washin' cloots, or budgie seed.
In every ither road or place
we find this very ace o' shops.
Jacked oot wi' potted heid an' lace,
spuds, matches 'dummies', lollipops.

There's biscuits, peens, and ices, cakes,
purns o' threed, pies, buttons, twine,
Sugar bools an' a'; soap flakes,
an' ipecacuanhi wine.
Ye never ken jist what ye'll see
in windae sma' – on coonter tae –
It tak's some beatin', you'll agree.
Wee “Johnny A'Thing's” braw display.